So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
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