She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Randomize
