i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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