great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Randomize
