we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
