I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
