sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
