honey bunches of taint.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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