why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
My vagina just recognized that song.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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