Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Everyone says I win the strip club
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Randomize
