He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
It's Friday. Sex?
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Randomize
