playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Randomize
