It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize
