Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Randomize
