Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i was born a porn star she said
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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