When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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