You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
He shit in the fireplace
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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