oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
