i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
