Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
