4 words: hood of his car
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Randomize
