i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Randomize
