i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
