I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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