I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Reggie can tackle my bush.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
All the doctor said was why
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize
