go do what you do best...puke behind churches
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Found your dick twin last night
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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