smell my finger.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize