have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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