She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
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