i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I think people are normalizing furries
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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