i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
