Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I'm eating all of the evidence.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Randomize
