There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Randomize
