I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
