I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
