Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
