Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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