why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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