you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
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