Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
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