school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
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