I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
You left your underwear on the fireplace
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
