well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
