**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
Randomize
