no, he came in my armpit
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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