i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
