I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
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