YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Randomize
