Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize