covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
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